June 10th, 2037
0900
Dear
Earth Diary
BEEP,
BEEP, BEEP
Oh dear
God. They put in a new alarm clock and it’s the same alarm as on my spaceship
and it’s driving me insane. I’ll just put it on snooze.
…There
are no buttons.
“Ugh.
It’s the deluxe version with voice control. Hurry up and turn it off”
Oh. Ahem.
‘Snooze.’
BEEP,
BEEP, BEEP
Snooze.
BEEP,
BEEP, BEEP
SNOOZE!
BEEP,
BEEP, BE - DID YOU SAY SNOOZE?
Yes.
THE WORD
SNOOZE IS NOT FOUND IN MY VOCABULARY.
BEEP,
BEEP, BEEP
Oh dear
God.
0921
BEEP,
BEEP, BE –
…I think
that did it.
“Thank
goodness for that. Did you find the shut off?”
No. I
just threw it in the toilet.
“That’d
do it. Do you know what today is?”
Tuesday?
“Wednesday,
but that’s not what I meant. It’s June the 10th.”
Yeah I
know that. It’s also coincidentally the day I get executed.
“No it
isn’t.”
What?
“It’s
Mary Saves The Day!”
How –
“…Day.”
- Are you
planning to do that?
“That
would spoil the surprise.”
I am
quite okay with that.
“Besides,
I already told you. Ages back.”
You did?
“Well, I
strongly hinted, anyway. June 10th, 1500.”
…I
vaguely remember that. What happens at 1500?
“That
would spoil the – “
Oh shut
up. There’s something you forgot too, you know.
“What?”
That it’s
also I Get Executed Day… Day.
“You didn’t
need to say day twice. And I hadn’t forgotten. It’s my execution too. I put a
reminder in my phone.”
And that’s
at 1445. In other words, whatever you’ve planned, it will be too late.
“That’s
why we need to stall them.”
How are
you planning on doing that?
“What’s
the thing you hate most about NASA?”
That they
put me in a spaceship and blasted me in to space and then pretended the ship
was faulty so I would crash land on a planet where their secret clone army had
been grown by mistake?
“…What’s
the thing you hate second-most about NASA?”
Um… I
dunno. How obsessed they are with rules?
“Exactly.
We just need to our bureaucratic them.”
I’m not
sure you’re using that word correctly.
“That’s
good! Use that one!”
1000
CLANG
“Ok scum,
get up! Do you know what day it is?”
Wednesday?
“…Yes.
But it’s also the day when you die!”
You’ve
got a real way with words.
“Shut up.
Let’s go.”
Hang on,
don’t we get breakfast.
“Why
waste food on dead people?”
What
about our last meal?
“When was
the last time you ate?”
Last
night.
“That
would be your last meal then.”
…Damn it.
“Come on.”
Okay, but
we’ll need to stop on the way so I can use the bathroom.
“Just use
the toilet over there.”
It’s
alarmed.
“…Whatever.
Come on.”
1011
Mary, I’m
kind of scared.
“Just
follow my lead and everything will be fine.”
Are you
sure?
“I
promise.”
It’s just
that…
“What?”
How can I
follow your lead if you’re behind me?
“I hate
you.”
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