Thirty-Second Entry

March 9^th, 2037

2015

Dear Space Diary

I have been kidnapped by a golden retriever.

I don’t mean a dog. That would actually be preferable at this stage. In fact, I have been kidnapped by a giant ball of light, but it’s definitely golden, and it can definitely retrieve.

I wonder if that’s what it’s doing with me. Was it sent to retrieve me? Is it working for something else? Or is it entirely on its own, and I merely took its fancy?

Oh dear God, I hope it isn’t attracted to me. That would be awkward.

2115

Been travelling for over an hour now. I wonder where Lightdog is taking me.  And why?

And for that matter, how? I don’t seem to be connected to it in any way, and yet I’m very clearly been towed along behind it, much the same as if I had been tied to it with a rope.

There it is ahead of me glowing away.

NASA are still asleep/hung over, so I’m on my own until “morning.” Thanks guys.

Not much I could do in any case. It’s like I have any way of moving this thing. And while there doesn’t seem to be anything stopping me just opening the door and hopping out, “possible terror” trumps “certain death by lead poisoning” any day of the week.

2130

I’ve just remembered I’m sitting inside a rocket ship. You know, with rocket engines.

Never tried firing them in mid-air before, but there’s no real reason that I couldn’t, I think. Certainly worth a shot.

2200

Well, that didn’t go so well. Ow.

Whatever Lightdog is doing to tether my ship, it’s bloody strong. But not immovable. When I fired the engines, all that happened was that I spun around the light. Right into a cliff.

Ow.

The ship seems undamaged, but then if it could survive colliding into a planet at speeds that were faster than light, a cliff on conventional rockets must be child’s play.

If the child had a rocket, and enjoyed smashing that rocket into cliffs.

Lightdog either didn’t notice, or didn’t care about my little escape attempt. Although we do seem to be travelling faster now.  I wonder how you tell if you’ve annoyed a giant ball of light.

Come to think of it, who knows if I should be describing this in terms of human emotions? It may not even have emotions for all I know. It might not even be alive.

Either way, that’s a moot point. Doesn’t seem to be anything I can do about it right now.

Strangely that’s rather reassuring. Think I’ll get some sleep. Maybe when I wake up this will all have been some horrible dream.

March 10^th, 2037

0400

AAARGH! Oh, what a terrible nightmare!

I dreamed I was lost on an alien planet light years away from earth, and had been abducted by a ball made out of… Nope, I’m still here.

Damn it. Oh well, it was worth a shot.