206th Entry

June 4^th, 2037

1147

Dear Earth Diary

Where’s the rest of you?

“Do I look like I’m in a position to know that?”

Can’t you like, sense your limbs or something?

“…You don’t know a whole lot about how people work do you.”

You’re remarkably calm about this.

“I’ve been a brain in a jar before. Which isn’t weird to say at all…”

And you don’t know why they did this?

“Of course I know. I’m a clone. Whatever they designed worked. The rest of them are basically unreachable, but because we’re clever, we went right to them. They want me. They want me bad.”

3.0. I’m… I’m so sorry.

“Don’t be. I wanted to see Earth. We didn’t know they would catch us. And I kind of had eyes for you.”

Yeah. I know.

“I don’t anymore.”

Oh. Well I guess I haven’t been the most appreciative of your feelings…

“No, I mean I don’t have eyes anymore.”

If you had a mouth, would you be grinning right now?

“Widely.”

I should probably get back to escaping. Do you want to come with me?

“I’m don’t think brains are self-sustaining. Without a fresh supply of clone juice I’ll probably die.”

Yeah… you’re probably right.

“Also I’m pretty sure I’m bolted to the table. Guess they don’t want me spilling clone juice everywhere.”

Please stop saying clone juice. Just stop.

“Sorry.”

3.0… this sucks. After everything we’ve been through, this is what happens to you? It’s… it’s no way to live!

“I’ve lived plenty. More than lots of people. How many people can say they’ve been grown in a tank on an alien planet and helped defy a strange shadow corporation?”

Several hundred.

“And they’re all really glad of it. Because we met you, we had lives. That may not have happened otherwise. We’d just grow and grow until they figured out a way to come and get us.”

Yeah…

“Seriously, thank you. Now get out of here. Go not be a brain in a jar.”

Will you be ok?

“They’ve got solitaire in here.”

That’s not what I meant.

“Yeah. I know.”

Goodbye 3.0.

“Goodbye. If you manage to overthrow the bad guys, come and grow me a new body.”

I promise.

“Oh, and one more thing.”

Yes?

“Clone juice.”

1153

I didn’t really want to leave 3.0 in her current state, but she kept hissing at me until I left.

A hissing brain is quite a disconcerting thing.

The thing that’s bothering me – apart from 3.0 just being brainjar, is that means the rest of her is probably being used to make more clones.

You know, that whole thing I just spent the last few weeks trying to stop.

Well admittedly not the whole time was doing that. I bumped into things and got lost a lot too. Also there was bacon.

I miss bacon.

But more importantly, if they’re making more clones, I have to stop them.

That’s more important than escaping. Than anything.

Except for bacon.