138th Entry

March 24^th 2037

0900

Dear Space Diary

Right, now an acceptable time of morning.

KNOCK KNOCK

Mary? Are you in there?

“Yeah come on in.”

Just came to check in and see how… wow. You look tired.

“Haven’t really slept properly in, well, a good few weeks now. There was synthesising the fuel, then all the stuff with shutting down the clone facility, then the launch, then this…”

But what about all the times when we stopped for the night? We slept then.

“You slept then.”

But I think I would have noticed if you’d been awake all night.

“Not really. You were asleep.”

Oh. Well, in that case, don’t you think it’s time you got some sleep?

“I’ll sleep when I’m dead.”

Actually, that’s not how it works.

“Whatever. I’ve work to do.”

Ok, sure. Speaking of, how goes the abomination of science?

“Well! Thanks for asking. I’d like you to meet Mary 3.06.”

…That’s a grapefruit.

“Yes! A grapefruit spliced with the cloned cells of Mary 3.0! It doesn’t really count as human. Or even especially alive. But hopefully it’s alive enough to fool the scanner. Go on, pick it up.”

Does it bite?

“…It’s a grapefruit.”

Can it talk?

“It doesn’t have vocal cords. I haven’t, you know, given it organs or anything. I’ve just bonded the DNA.”

Does it do tricks?

“I’m not sure you fully understand how this whole cloning thing works.”

But Mary 3.0 can.

“Do tricks?”

Talk. Bite.

“Oh? You guys hit it off then?”

…Ha. I presume she does. I’ve seen her eat. Biting was involved.

“Don’t worry, I’m just messing with you. 1am humour.”

It’s 9 in the morning.

“Whatever! I’m tired.”

Get some sleep.

“No, I’ve too much work to do.”

What is there left to do? 3.06 is perfect!

“Yes, but I have to make another 100 or so to fool the scanner. They’re growing in the gene vat I made over there. And I might still have to make some changes if the scanner doesn’t register it as a clone.”

Well, let’s go check then!

0911

“Ok, here’s the scanner readout. What’s the number?”

…3! We did it!

“We?”

I offered moral support.

“I ask again. We?”

…You did it!

“Thank you.”

So we know it works. That’s fantastic! Here, have some grapefruit juice.

“Um, where did you get that?”

I just found it lying around, why?

“In… the lab?”

Yeah, there was this grapefruit on the bench. Didn’t look important, so I squeezed it. It screamed.

“Now you’re just being mean.”

Extremely. Don’t worry, I got it from the fridge. From a carton. No cannibalism involved.

“Ok, good. Mm, that’s actually pretty good!”

Glad you liked it. Because there’s something special about that juice.

“I know, it’s celebratory.”

Something else.

“…it’s chilled?”

I added something to the juice. Hope you don’t mind.

“Sugar?”

That, and about three ground up sleeping pills.

“You. That was a really low thing to –“

THUMP

Sweet dreams Mary. You’ve earned them.